Dirty Hippy Banned from Entering US

So apparently Cat Stevens is going to kill us all. He's therefore not allowed entry into the US, and rightly so. Donations he's made to Muslim organizations have apparently been linked to funds used by terrorists at some point, somehow, which means he himself poses enough of a threat to be on "a government terrorism watch list." Now I'm sure I don't have even a fraction of the information the homeland security people have (though I'm sure a lot of them don't have a fraction of the intelligence *I* have, muahaha) but seriously. The man is a dirty f*ing hippy. REAL hippies aren't terrorists. They're against that. He's all about peace and rainbows and lately, Allah. But despite the fact that Allah and Mohammad are themselves horrible terrorists (at least from what I've interpreted from the news), I doubt very seriously that CAT STEVENS would be all like, "hey, I know I gave half of the proceeds of my last album to victims of 9/11, but you, terrorists, how about you have the other half, and just go on killing innocent people and accomplishing nothing productive at all. I'm all for people who kill." Besides, um, if we're going after people who've funded and even say...TRAINED people who are now a terrorist threat, shouldn't we go after ourselves as well? The whole thing just makes me want to go home and bite my pillow. (that last bit was for you Shannon)

Gumbo + Kashi = Big Thumbs Down

I have digestive troubles. My system, like fine china, requires that its meals be eaten with care. Friday night and Saturday morning I sloshed my way eagerly through a *huge* amount of homemade gumbo, complete with andouille sausage (which usually makes my insides nice and fiery). Saturday afternoon I chased that mess with a Kashi malted chocolate protein bar. Big mistake. I wanted it because it was healthier and more filling than a candy bar, but still pretty much tasted like a candy bar. Brett made a crack about Kashi and its magical ability to produce unnecessary amounts of poop. I ignored him. Later that evening, I suddenly doubled over in pain. Waddled to the bathroom, still doubled over. Sat on the toilet doubled over. Stayed there for a good long while. Then fell asleep in an uncomfortable ball with a heating pad on my tummy. I've learned something from this...apparently if gumbo turns my insides into a ball of liquid fire, and kashi enables me to produce higher than normal amounts of poop, the two together produce a higher than normal amount of liquid fire poop. I'm still recovering, but my insides somehow feel a little cleaner and more fit. I ate another Kashi bar yesterday, and one today, so we'll see how that goes. Maybe old people are on to something with this whole extra fiber thing...