O. M. G.

I'm so pissed. Well, I guess I'm also relieved, but still. GRR!!! Brett just got home from work, and we were having a friendly little conversation while I was cleaning in the kitchen and he was opening the mail, and then he stopped talking, and made a little panicked noise.

"What's wrong?!?" I ask.

"Oh. My. God." is his response.

"WHAT'S WRONG?!?" I ask again, now panicked myself and rushing from the kitchen to the dining room, where he's sorting the mail.

He pauses for a moment, then asks, "How can they do this?!? This should be illegal."

He hands me what appears to be a final notice on our FUCKING MORTGAGE, complete with an angry all-caps headline and unfriendly pink paper.

I gasp, my mind flooding with memories of always always ALWAYS paying the mortgage on time. What do we do?!? How do we fix this?!? How did this happen?!?

"It's fake." he says. "It's a fucking ad. See?" He points to the actual body of the letter, where the words "PRE-APPROVE," "LOWER INTEREST RATE," "CASH BACK," etc. have been bolded.

I read it twice, just to make sure. My panic is replaced by indignation. I've never ever EVER been late on a mortgage payment (or even rent, back in the day), which is probably why they want us to refinance with them. But sending a fake pink notice? Like, what the butt? I conduct my business in a business-like fashion, and if I'm ever interested in refinancing and losing our sick-ass, super-low interest rate, I'll be dealing with a company that behaves similarly, thank you very much. I don't care for StoneCreek Capital Mortgage's awful alarmist direct marketing one bit. :P